


Hidden Objects

by BenSoloHands



Category: Reylo - Fandom, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Cassette Tape - Freeform, Emergency room, F/M, If you love Yanni then you might get offended, M/M, Smut, This is crack, Yanni - Freeform, drunk, shoving things up the anus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:27:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29010516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BenSoloHands/pseuds/BenSoloHands
Summary: Ben gets drunk and shoves an object up his ass. It gets stuck so he goes to the ER and Rey is the nurse........yeah LOLTwitter: @bensolohands
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 23
Kudos: 43





	Hidden Objects

Ben hated parties, he liked being at home alone watching nature documentaries and shit. Tonight though, Poe and Hux talked him into having a “Small” get together at his house. The word small was total bullshit. Poe invited 40 of his coworkers and they were making a damn mess of his house. 

“Solo! You need to loosen up! Here, try this shit!” Poe yelled over the loud music handing Ben a giant whiskey bottle. It was a brand name he had never heard of. 

“What the hell is this shit Poe.” Ben asked, taking the cork out of the bottle. Poe took the bottle from him, poured a giant glass and handed it to him.

“It's about to be your new best friend now drink up!” Poe yelled. 

“Fine, but I better not be sick as shit tomorrow.” Ben replied, taking a swig of the brown liquid.

  
  
  


2 Hours Later…….

“Who wants Jell-O shots!?” Ben screamed while standing on his coffee table. Apparently Poe was right about his new liquid best friend. 

“SOLO what the hell is this?!” Hux yelled standing in front of Ben’s music collection. 

“Yeah I can’t believe you own this!” Poe said, grabbing the cassette tape out of Hux’s hand. 

Ben stumbled over to Hux and Poe almost knocking over his new potted plant. He took the cassette tape from Poe and stared at it. 

“This my friends, is none other than Yanni’s greatest hits! I used to listen to it all the fucking time back in college to help me concentrate on my homework.” Ben said, giving the cassette a kiss. Poe and Hux almost pissed themselves while laughing. 

“Solo,Yanni blows ass!” Hux said, taking the cassette back from him. 

“You know what I think you should do with this? Shove it up your ass!” Poe said, grabbing the cassette and waving it in Ben’s face. 

“Is that a dare!?” Ben asked with determination written all over his pretty face. 

“Fuck yes it is!” Poe said looking at Hux and giggling. 

“You're on motherfucker” Ben yelled, running to his bedroom to grab his bottle of jerking off lube. Hux turned to Poe when he saw Ben come back with the lube and unbuttoning his pants.

“I think this bastard is really going to shove Yanni up his ass!” He said looking at Poe. 

“Everyone can I have your attention please!” Ben yelled and climbed back up on the coffee table. “It has come to my attention by Poe Dameron and shitty Hux over there.” Ben said waving his hands drunkenly towards them, “That Yanni blows ass! Therefore, I’m about to shove his cassette where the sun doesn't goddamn shine!” 

Ben pulled down his pants and bared himself to his audience. There was a collective gasp and he squeezed an assload of lube on his fingers and bent over to get himself ready. 

“You're going to need more than that Solo! That's a wide cassette tape!.” Hux yelled while slapping Poe on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry you ginger bitch I can take it!” Ben replied as pressed the cassette to his asshole. It took about 10 minutes with some maneuvering, cheering from the crowd and of course more lube cause that bitch Hux was right. 

“And Yanni is now where he belongs! UP MY ASS!” Ben yelled and took a bow as the crowded clapped and cheered. Ben waddled over to Hux and Poe, trying to keep his ass from hurting too damn bad.

“Whose the fucking man now you cunts!” Ben yelled at them as he took another drink.

“Well I hope the fucking man doesnt have any trouble digging Yanni out of his ass.” Hux said smacking Ben on his ass cheek. 

“Don’t do that! It hurts you ginger fuck!” Ben yelled at Hux. 

“Maybe you should try and get Yanni out now, you don’t want to get some sort of asshole infection by leaving that in too long.” Poe said giggling at Hux. 

Ben’s ass was starting to feel a little sore. He made his way to his bathroom while Hux and Poe followed. They had to see this.

“This shouldn’t be too hard, I mean I got the fucking thing up there didn’t I?” Ben said after a few minutes of trying with his fingers. 

“Maybe I should get some pliers.” Hux laughed while looking in the bathroom drawers. 

“Hell no! I’m not putting anything else up my ass!” Ben replied, starting to panic. He looked over at Poe, 

“Dude, I don’t think I can reach it! What the fuck am I going to do! Help me Poe!” Ben started to whine. 

“Ok look just hold still let me try.” Poe said as he reached for Ben’s ass and gently slid a finger inside. 

“Hux stop taking pictures!” Ben yelled seeing Hux out of the corner of his eye with his phone out. 

“I need this for my YouTube channel!” Hux replied.

“Ben, I don’t think it's going to come out! Try shitting it out!” Poe said, backing away from him. Ben sat down on the toilet and started screaming.

“Oh my god it hurts! I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it!” He sobbed looking over at Poe. 

“Dude, we may have to take you to the fucking ER!” Poe said helping Ben off the toilet and pulling his pants back up. 

“Oh fuck no! I can’t be humiliated like that! What if my mommy finds out!” Ben said while he began to drunkenly cry. 

“We don’t have a choice you stupid fuck! Now let's go!” Hux yelled as they started dragging Ben outside to his car. 

“Party’s over! Everybody clear out!” Poe yelled as they left the house. 

  
  
  


Meanwhile over at Skywalker Memorial Hospital, Nurse Rey Johnson was bored and having a slow night. All she had so far on her shift that evening were stitches and a head injury. Rey was sitting at the emergency check in desk when 3 yelling drunks came in. Two of them were trying to get the tall drink of water to sit down in a wheelchair but he cried in pain every time he tried to sit down.

“Oh fuck, is this some kind of kinky 3-way gone wrong?” Rey said to herself as they walked up to the desk. 

“How may I help you gentlemen?” She said trying to be professional. 

“He needs help! Yanni is stuck up his ass and we can’t get him out!” Hux said pointing at Ben with a shit eating grin on his face. 

“Fuck you Hux!” Ben replied as he winced in pain. 

“Ok so, you have a foreign object up your rectum I take it?” Rey replied as she handed Poe some paperwork. It was then that Rey got a good look at this 45 foot tall man. God he was gorgeous, Rey really hoped he was single and not gay. 

Ben couldn’t believe his eyes, that most angelic woman he had ever seen was going to be the nurse that got Yanni out of his fucking ass. He had the worst fucking luck. He was going to kick Hux in the balls after this just to let off some steam. 

“Yes mam, and it's hurting so bad right now I can hardly see straight.” Ben replied with pleading eyes. 

“Ok, only one of you can come back to his room with him, the other one has to wait out here.” Rey said as she motioned for them to follow her. 

“Hux get your ass back to my house and make sure all those fuckers are gone and that its not burning the fuck down!” Ben said as he waddled with Poe to follow Rey. 

Hux took Ben’s car keys and made his way out the door. Rey led them to a private room and closed the door. Poe helped Ben lay on his side on the exam table.

“Let me get Dr. Storm, I will be right back.” Rey said, giving Ben a comforting smile and a pat on his shoulder. 

“Paging Dr. Finn Storm, Dr Storm to the ER.” Rey said over the intercom system. 

“Fuck me Poe! She’s beautiful and now she’s going to assist with digging a fucking cassette out of my ass! Why can’t I meet the beautiful ones the regular way. Like in a CVS or some shit!” Ben whined, putting his face in his hands. 

“Dude, I don’t know what to tell you….maybe you will get lucky and maybe she’s a Yanni fan!” Poe replied dodging Ben’s fist. 

  
  


“Rey, did you page me?” Finn asked walking up to the nurses station. 

“Yes Finn, some drunk has something called a Yanni up his ass.” Rey replied.

“What the fuck is a Yanni?” Finn asked, looking confused. 

“I guess we will find out. I hope its not some new gay sex toy though cause the guy is soooooo hot and I want him for myself when this is over.“ Rey replied as they walked back into Ben’s room. 

“Hello there Mr. Solo, My name is Dr. Storm and Rey tells me you have a giant Yanni up your rectum?” Finn said as he looked over and noticed the beautiful Hispanic standing in the corner. 

“Hi I’m Ben’s friend Poe Dameron.” Poe said as he reached out to shake the hand of the beautiful slice of chocolate cake that just walked in. Finn gave him a wink and a smile. 

“Ok so first things first, we need an x-ray. Rey will wheel you down to radiology so we can get a look at this Yanni and we will go from there!” Finn said as he typed the order into the computer. 

“It's actually a cassette tape, you know, that shit from the 80’s before cd’s came along.” Ben said peeking up at Finn and Rey. 

“It was a dare ok! Plus I was drunk out of my mind and I still kind of am!” Ben said looking away from Rey. 

“Sure Mr. Solo, Rey can you take him down to x-ray now? I will stay here with Mr. Dameron and um….keep him company until you two get back.” Finn said, giving Poe a seductive look. 

Rey helped Ben adjust himself into the wheelchair and they made their way to x-ray. 

Ben knew if he had any chance with this woman he had to explain himself. 

“Um...look I’m not normally like this. I was drunk, Poe and Hux said Yanni sucked so he needed to be shoved up my ass and at the time I thought it was the right thing to do. I havent been drunk in like 6 fucking months and Poe must have given me some strong shit.” Ben rattled on as Rey pushed his wheelchair and listened. 

“So….your not gay?” Rey asked. Her question came totally out of left field but she wanted to be sure. 

“Oh fuck no! I like pussy! Poe is the one that likes things in his ass, I should have made him do this.” Ben replied. Rey stopped at the door to x-ray and stood in front of Ben giving him a giant smile.

“I’m glad to hear that Mr. Solo.” She said then pushed him into the room. Ben knew at this point he had this woman. Fuck yes. 

After the x-ray, they made their way back to Ben’s room to find Finn and Poe making out on the bed. 

“Oh Rey hey! Um…..I was just checking Poe for cavities. He said he’s been having toothaches lately! So you got that x-ray for me!?” Finn babbled as Rey handed him the x-ray of what was clearly a cassette tape. Ben gave Poe an evil stare and crawled back up onto the bed. 

“Ok Mr. Solo, we are going to flush this rectangular bitch out of your anus. I will give you an enema, lube up my hands really good and pull this sucker out!” Finn smiled brightly at Ben and snapped on some gloves. Rey snapped on some gloves as well and got the lube ready. 

“Excuse me doctor, could I maybe try to get it out? I would love the practice in case something like this ever happens again and you're not around or something...you know.” Rey asked Finn, giving him a knowing look. Finn smiled and winked at Rey.

“Sure Rey! I will just observe.” Finn replied, moving out of Rey’s way. 

“Now Ben, lay on your side and try to relax, I will be as gentle as possible.” Rey said whispering into Ben’s big pretty ears. Ben nodded and laid down facing the wall. Rey shoved the enema up his ass and he let out a screech. 

“Enema is in Ben, now here comes my lubed up fingers!” Rey said with a little too much enthusiasm. 

“AHHH FUCK ME REY!” Ben yelled as she started digging around for the hidden cassette.

“Oh I will, Just have to get Mr. Yanni out of the way first.” Rey whispered into his ear. This woman was going to be the death of him. For some reason it started to feel good when Rey reached a certain spot and he couldn't help but let out a moan. 

‘“Oh...shit Rey….what are you...ahhhh fuck! Yeah right there.” Ben huffed while Rey hit just the right spot causing him to have a massive boner through his hospital gown. 

“Almost got it!” Rey said as she rubbed his ass cheek with her other hand. Ben let out a squeal and then it was all over.

“GOT IT!” Rey said beaming at Finn and Poe while holding up Yanni. Finn and Poe clapped and said their congratulations while Ben was on the bed still panting. 

“Oh fuck this enema is working, I really need to go shit!” Ben yelled, jumping up to run into the bathroom. 

“He should be fine Poe, we will give him some pain killers and you can take him home...unless you would like to take me home instead? My shift is over in 30 minutes.” Finn said eyeing Poe’s crotch. 

Poe smiled and was just about to respond when Rey spoke up, “I get off in 30 minutes too, I can take Ben home if you guys would like to leave together.” She said winking at them. 

“Sounds good Rey, I will get his discharge papers and his meds ready. “Finn said as he looked over at Poe. 

“Wanna wait for me in my office?” 

“Sure my chocolate bear! Led the way!” Poe said as they walked out the door.

Rey was cleaning up the room when Ben finally walked out of the bathroom. “Where the fuck is Poe?” He asked.

“Oh he’s getting a ride home with Finn…..and I’m going to give you a ride before I take you home.” Rey said, licking her lips and walking over to him. 

Ben looked at her wide eyed, “Don’t you mean give me a ride home?” He asked sitting down on the bed while she stood between his legs. 

“No you big sexy bitch, you heard me right the first time.” Rey said as she crashed her lips into his. 

Ben was so happy he could burst, this hot woman was going to fuck him and Yanni was finally in the god damn trash can. Rey ripped his tight shirt off and shoved him back onto the bed. Ben grabbed her scrubs and yanked them off while grinding his dick against her wet center. Rey moaned, pulled Ben’s pants down and grabbed his big thick cock in both her hands. 

“So, you like Yanni do you? Well so do I. Wanna listen to him while I fuck you?” Rey asked, pulling out her iPod. 

“Hell no! You're never going to let me live this down are you baby? Yanni can kiss my ass! Just blow me!!” Ben said as he shoved her head onto his dick. Rey sucked his cock like it was going out of fucking style. 

“Rey I want to cum inside you!” Ben yelled as he grabbed her hips and pulled her pants down. 

“There are a ton of condoms in this hospital. Do we need one? I have an IUD.” Rey asked as she kissed his pecks. 

“No I’m squeaky fucking clean!” Ben moaned as he impaled Rey on his giant dick. 

“Oh my god Ben! Your so fucking big!” She moaned as she rode him like a fucking horse. Ben didn’t last long, he came so hard he almost went blind when Rey clenched around his cock. 

“Im going to take you home and fuck you all god damn night.” Rey panted as she reached for her scrubs. 

“Please do, but no fucking Yanni alowed.” Ben replied as he kissed her forehead and smacked her ass. 

“How about strap on’s?” Rey whispered. 

Ben’s ass started to ache. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
